Holistic Holiday at Sea, 2011

First published February 27, 2011

These are my reflections upon a kick-off event for Holistic Holiday at Sea, 2011

           Besides John Salley I was the tallest person in the room, which contained maybe 150 other people.  We had gathered at a restaurant called “Sublime”, an all-vegan, all the time eatery in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.  Jennifer and her mother and I had flown down that morning from our home in Eastern PA, and armed with a glass of wine each we now were mingling about the gala.  This was the kick-off to our one week “Holistic Holiday at Sea” cruise that would set sail from the port of the above named city and head for various stops in the Caribbean, such as Key West and Grand Cayman.  I can’t name all the stops because, frankly, I’m not that interested in them.  The objects of my primary focus on this project is relaxation on the good ship, Poesia, and attending lectures by various luminaries and learneds  in the realm of healthy living. 

            With that smidgen of background I will return to Mr. Salley, whom I’ve kept hanging all this time up at the top of the last paragraph.  I was endeavoring to converse with this former Detroit Piston (that’s an NBA basketball team) and finding that my efforts were costing me neck pain.  I was determined to look him in the eye, even if the enterprise was much like trying to gaze upon Old Glory from the base of the flagpole.  It occurred to me that I was the only other person at this party who had a chance.  Everyone else was resigned to talking to John Salley’s tie tack. 

            John had just issued a short “welcome aboard” speech to the gathering during which he extolled the wondrous cuisine of Sublime.  He had mentioned a few dishes he particularly recommended but in the surrounding bustle and noise I had missed the particulars.  Besides that, I wanted to parlay a bit with the fellow.  So from my venue at the rear I had wormed my way through the mob and camped for a moment at Salley’s elbow whilst he charmed two comely young women.  Emboldened by a glass or two or three of Pinot, at the instant there was a brief pause in their conversation I burst into the breach.  “What is it that I should order?” I called up like a sailor might shout from the deck to the Cap’n on the bridge.  My query immediately threw John Salley into a pensive pose with his right hand to his chin and his left, in a show of warmth, to the back of my right upper arm.  His face turned toward the ceiling (upon which he could, no doubt, examine specks of dust).  After a moment of inner prioritizing he declared that the Frito Misto was at the top of this list.  This is a cauliflower dish prepared with a sweet chili and sesame seed glaze.  It soon after proved worthy of John’s accolades.  A mushroom dish was mentioned along with a couple of others and then, before I could even make proper mental notes John set forth upon a description of his experience of the previous evening at the same restaurant when he urged his “flesh-eating” girlfriend (his descriptor) to try the said cauliflower dish.  According to John her culinary preferences tend toward roasted pork chops smothered in gravy.  But the first bite of the cauliflower dish caused her to ejaculate gushes of delight at its overall yumminess. 

            Let’s leave John now and move on to some of the other stars who will figure prominently in our week at sea.  Sandy Pukel, a smiling skeleton in a bright gingham shirt organized the first “Holiday at Sea” several years ago. Upon my self--introduction Sandy made me feel more than welcome and urged me to seek him out should anything strike me as amiss throughout the cruise. 

            At some point I found myself in close orbit of T. Colin Campbell, author of The China Study, a treatise on nutrition that is something of a classic to aficionados.  Dr. Campbell had just dispatched a fawning dentist from New York and his sister.  The dentist had declared himself “a big fan,” who had “read all your books,” so on and so forth, while his sister harmonized with such platitudes as “he’s read all your books,” and “he talks about you all the time” to Dr. Campbell’s bored and slightly uncomfortable expressions of gratitude.  Upon my own greeting and admission that I had read none of his books, T. Colin was most kind and readily engaged.  We talked of pet nutrition (HE introduced the subject) after it emerged that he had attended a year of veterinary study at Georgia before moving on to Cornell where he took a Ph.D.  Dogs do just fine on vegetarian food, cats not so much, we agreed. 

            I said hello to Christina Pirello, author of Cooking the Whole Foods Way.  I charmed her by mentioning that I had won a signed copy of her cookbook more than a decade earlier simply by knowing that there are three teaspoons in a tablespoon and being willing to email proof of that knowledge to a radio cooking show as answer to that week’s contest. 

            Neal Barnard, M.D., founder and head of Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine (PCRM) gave a brief PowerPoint presentation that showed obese American children, rats used in horrible experiments in which they are stuffed in tubes for hours a day and forced to inhale toxins, squirrel monkeys bombarded with radiation and chimpanzees subjected to a squeeze cage each day for months on end in order to inject them and obtain blood samples.  His organization has successfully convinced NASA to find alternatives to animal research.  PCRM has also successfully lobbied congress to make the FDA issue nutritional guidelines slightly less deferential to the meat, poultry and dairy industries.  So, Neal Barnard has carried on the good fight and proved himself an all around Good Joe. 

            Among the crowd were obvious and lovable eccentrics, skinny bitches, one woman in what Jen describes as “fuck me attire," some very healthy looking seniors, some, not so much.  In short, a variety of personages but, on the whole, a fit, trim and happy lot.  Let me, just now, get back to the sycophantic dentist and his sister whom I mentioned above.  Because, in crowds, I become a cynical snot (it’s a defense mechanism, OK?!), I sometimes don’t give people their just due.  This pair would be two examples.  They are enthusiastic about a life style that suits them, is good for them and is much more the exception than the norm in our society.  They spread the gospel of healthy living, and there’s nothing wrong with that.  Much better than some Pentacostal twit running about spreading superstition and urging all to get themselves splashed with water as a form of redemption.

            The fact is the world would be a happier, healthier, less-polluted orb if all its inhabitants foreswore meat-based diets.  And that’s about all I have to say about that.  We sail at dawn!